It has been awhile and I have a pathetic amount of instagram pics to share this week.

I’ve been busy.

Now that I am gone from home 5 hours per day, I spend my time at home on the floor with my little one and doing the million little things that a homemaker does each day. You see, I don’t want to sacrifice being the type of mom I’ve always wanted to be.  The mom who makes her own baby food, who keeps the home clean and organized.  The mom who cooks homemade meals, bakes dessert, and does the laundry. A full-time mom.  I am trying to be a full-time mom on a part-time schedule.

I am exhausted.

At work they keep asking me if it was really hard to leave my daughter, which of course only makes me feel worse.  But, really, I felt pretty good until last night.

I was done.  I didn’t want to go to work today.  I wanted one day at home.  One day to go to the park, feed my baby lunch, see her smiling face after her nap, to do SOMETHING . . . ANYTHING different.

I don’t understand people who want to work outside the home because they need to “get out of the house” or “have some variety”.  I feel more cooped up now that I am working.  Because I am gone so much, it really isn’t convenient for me to go out with Addie the hours I am home.  Hopefully, when the days lengthen, that will change.  Right now, however, it is waking up, getting ready, eating breakfast, pumping, playing with baby, work, work, work, come home, play with baby, prepare dinner, put baby to bed, do online job, tidy up house, set out food and clothes for the next day, clean, bed.  

There is no time for errands, play dates, or parks.  This is just the first week, however, I am sure it will get better; I am praying that it will.

So, forgive my few instagram pics. 

Baby girl has been so tired at the end of each day.  She got her first cold a few days before i went back to work and all that coughing has exhausted her.  I love when she snuggles on me, though.  Note the work clothes.  Addie loves it.  I come home each day to her with jewelery on and fancy clothes.  She has been quite enthralled.

 We finally are able to sit on our grass!  These toes love the grass.  She is just like her mother.  Bare feet are the best.

 One of my last “lunch dates” with my daughter.  Here I am finishing off a block of Dubliner cheese (that I had purchased the previous evening for a new year’s eve snack . . . I pretty much ate the entire block myself in less than 24 hours . . . it is that good).

 My brother packed up Addie’s blocks before we left to come back home from our Christmas travels.  He left a secret message.  I can’t wait to visit again soon!


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